With Valentine’s Day just behind us, those of us who are single are probably thinking about finding our perfect partner right now. Ok, maybe not ‘Perfect’ partner, but a partner all the same.
If you have been single for a while, you might be thinking that you are just not ‘lucky’ enough to find someone, or that others know of some ‘secret formula’ to finding love and happiness.
I have some news for you! You don’t have to be lucky to find a partner (perfect or otherwise) and there is definitely no ‘secret formula’. There are, however, a few things you can do to help Cupid improve his aim!
Perfect partner magnets:
- Be open to the possibility. If you are thinking that you will never find your perfect partner then that is exactly what will happen! If the thought of finding your perfect partner for life is a little too much at the moment, then just focus on finding the best person for you right now!
- Remove as much baggage as possible from previous relationships. How can you possibly have a new relationship if your ex is still on the scene? While it may be nice to ‘stay friends’ after a break up, ask yourself if this is really a good situation to be in. How can you move forward when you have bungee roped yourself to your ex? Children from previous relationships are a blessing and NOT baggage. If your ex is involved in their lives (which they should be) give clear boundaries, they are involved in the children’s lives and NOT YOURS.
- Bring down your defences. If you have been hurt in the past, as many of us have, there is a good chance that you have built defences to protect you from the same pain in the future. While it’s nice to think of a knight in shining armour coming to rescue you from your demons, this is not going to happen! There is only one person in the world who has the right tools to bring down your defences and that person is YOU!
- Decide exactly what you are looking for in a partner. If you don’t know what you are looking for in a partner how will you know when you have found them? Keep your expectations realistic and focus on personality rather than monetary wealth. It doesn’t matter how much money there is when you are happy in the arms of someone you love (the Beatles were right you know!!).
- Love yourself. This may sound like ‘hippie rubbish’ but if you are giving out vibrations of not being good enough or worthy of love then people will respond to that. When you love yourself there is an increase in confidence which the whole world can see and this will make you more attractive to the right person for you.
- Get out of the way. How can Cupid hit the right target when you are sat at home on your own? Arrange a night out with friends with a view to having fun, if this is not practical then join some on-line dating sites. Do not have the intention of finding someone, just have fun and see what happens, but remember to be open to the possibility.
- Trust your instincts. Believe it or not, intuition is great for finding the perfect partner. Trust that you know when you have found them and when you haven’t. There is a lot to be said for the ‘gut feeling’ we get, it’s there for a reason.
I know this sounds like a lot of hard work for something that should come naturally, and it is. This can work although it is not a secret formula and if nothing else, it will help you to be happier in yourself. I went through this process a little over a year ago after being single for 8 years and am now a year into a relationship with my Mr Perfect.